Tim Challies recently posted a blog about the book The Case for Civility by Os Guinness wherein the case is made that we need more civility in this world and that America is where it should start. This is the section from the blog that talks about why it should start in America:
It is a call for the United States to take the lead in restoring civility. “The place at which we must begin to search for answers is the United States. Not because the problem is worse here than elsewhere—on the contrary—but because America has the best cultural resources, and therefore the greatest responsibility to point the way forward in answering the deepest questions.” America is uniquely equipped to take the lead and Guinness urges her on
I'm not sure why anyone would think this about America (and I'm an American). I'm disturbed about the fact that it seems almost impossible to actually have civil discourse in America and if we are better off here than elsewhere then you must get spit on in the streets in other countries just for walking around. Look at the comment lists of blog posts and you'll see what I mean. It is appalling. The number of people that post comments in the name of kindness that are simply exercises in verbal bullying and brutality is astonishing. Most civil discourse that I have seen in blog threads and boards is terminated by the loud boorish shouting of people maintaining that somebody else is being "rude" or "insulting." This problem with civil discourse on the web is well known and has been a problem for a long time. There was a reason why all of the worthwhile Usenet groups on religion were heavily moderated and comment lists like Slashdot and Digg have (where you can vote down the worst offenders so that the rest of the comment list actually looks civil to later readers) were attempts to solve this problem, but in the end the root of the issue is that there are just too many people who believe that they are "kind" and "loving" and who are, in fact, the exact opposite. Anyone who is reading some thread or comment list and feels the urge from reading what some other commenter said that they merely disagree with to post an attack on the other person has the problem, not the original poster.
Listen, when you are reading something and you suddenly want to post a reply ask yourself in your reply if you are posting something substantive regarding what the actual discussion is or if you are posting a personal insult. Now, I have seen many people who post insults and then maintain that they are substantive so clearly the word "insult" is poorly understood, so here is another way to put it: does your comment have anything to do with the other person (as a person) at all? If it does, then maybe it is out of place. You see this demonstrated a lot in religious discussions where somebody makes some statement about a particular issue only to be replied to by some variation on, "Your constant attacks are sickening and only prove you are arrogant and unloving" and so forth. This response is not civil, it adds nothing to the discussion and furthermore it, itself, fails the test of a loving and gentle response called for in the Bible:
Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person. (Colossians 4:5-6)
The person who hurls the insults may think that they are given such a right by the actions of the person they are insulting. But this, too, is completely unchristian:
But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you. To one who strikes you on the cheek, offer the other also, and from one who takes away your cloak do not withhold your tunic either. (Luke 6:27-28)Even if the original commenter was your enemy your insulting response would not be acceptable. In many cases, if you read something that makes you angry you are better off doing what James says to do:
Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger (James 1:19)In terms of posting things on the Net, we could read it like this, "Let every person be quick to read, slow to post." We are better off posting nothing than posting some insulting response. These passages from Proverbs are apropos:
Whoever belittles his neighbor lacks sense,but a man of understanding remains silent. (Proverbs 11:12)Whoever restrains his words has knowledge,and he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding. (Proverbs 17:27) Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise;when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent. (Proverbs 17:28)
