I really love bookstores, and the bigger the better. I can get lost for hours in all of the possibilities among the stacks of books. It gets even better when it is somewhere like Barnes and Noble and they have those bargain books up front but it makes it really difficult not to spend a lot of money. A few days ago when I was at a Barnes and Noble I saw a new bargain book that Barnes and Noble had published called Wellsprings of Faith that contained three books: The Imitation of Christ by Thomas à Kempis, The Interior Castle by St. Teresa of Avila, and The Dark Night of the Soul by St. John of the Cross. Since it was only $20 (and quite thick- therefore full of promise), I bought it.
I started in at the beginning of the first book - The Imitation of Christ by Thomas à Kempis the night after buying the book and it is slow going. Part of this is the age of the translation (around 1900) which imbues the text with somewhat archaic wording but a bigger part of it is the density of each section. The Imitation of Christ is split up into small chunks that supposedly would form part of morning or evening devotional readings for the members of The Brethren of the Common Life, which à Kempis was a part of in the fifteenth century. Even after the first few sections the quotable quotes are numerous:
I had rather feel contrition, than know the definition thereof.
Who hath a harder struggle than he that laboureth to conquer himself?
But because many endeavour rather to know than to live well; therefore they are often deceived, and reap either none, or scanty fruit.
O, if men bestowed as much labour in the rooting out of vices, and planting of virtues, as they do in moving of questions, there would neither be so great evils and scandals in the world, nor so much looseness in religious houses.
Truly, when the day of judgment cometh, we shall not be examined what we have read, but what we have done.
Tell me, where are now all those Masters and Doctors, with whom thou wast well acquainted whilst they lived and flourished in learning? Now others possess their livings, and perhaps do scarce ever think of them. In their lifetime they seemed to be somewhat, but now they are not spoken of... O that their life had been answerable to their learning!
We ought not to believe every saying or suggestion, but ought warily and patiently to ponder the matter with reference to God. But alas! such is our weakness, that we often rather believe and speak evil of others than good.
Enquire willingly, and hear with silence the words of holy men: let not the proverbs of the elders displease thee, for they are not recounted without cause.
Extol not thyself for the height of thy stature, or beauty of thy person, which is disfigured and destroyed by a little sickness.
Continual peace is with the humble; but in the heart of the proud is envy and frequent indignation.
We think sometimes to please others by our company, and we begin rather to displease them with the wickedness which they discover in us.
And that is just a sampling which I cut short because I got tired of holding the book open and typing at the same time. Almost every line is thought-provoking so I find myself going slowly and reading lines over again and then sometimes stopping and thinking for awhile about whether I agree with him from a Biblical perspective (there are lots of scripture references and I don't always find I agree with the way he used them) and sometimes stopping and thinking about how right I think he is on other counts. The book is very humbling (you can see that in some of what I've quoted above), which is good. I find humility gives my heart peace. When I'm not trying to compete with everyone around me I feel better about everything I do. I don't find that I feel what I do is more worthy, but rather I care less about what others might think of what I do and more about what effect it might have for God in the world as he uses it. A friend I met on MySpace recently sent me a message that sums this up:
I don't think it's so much a matter of how we as individuals write, but what we write about that reaches the audience's heart.
I'll go even further than this and say that I think it comes down to understanding that it isn't me that has any effect at all but only God - this notion gives me peace and it doesn't have the effect that we sometimes think it might have - that of making us lazy. In fact if anything it has had the opposite effect on me because as I worry less about what others think of me and allow God to "give the increase" instead of trying to make the increase myself (a wasted effort, of course) I find myself actually doing more in the end than I ever did before. Though here I find I finally understand Galatians 2:20 and the meaning of Paul saying that he no longer lived but that Christ lived through him - I understand that it is not me doing these things and that makes them even easier to do.
Truly His yoke is easy and His burden is light.
